Epic Man Food

     February Fourteenth.  A day just like any other?  No.  This is the day that I invented my epic man food.  Even though that day has passed some time ago, I would still like to share the details of my creation here.  When I exclaimed that it was the greatest I had ever made, my roommate suggested that I write it down.  Here is my account of how it happened.
     Now I'm not going to try to exaggerate, I really am not that great at cooking and whatnot.  When I finally flew the coup and moved out to Utah, I refused to live off of ramen noodles and frozen microwaveable dinners.  Therefore, I have been slowly learning some new cooking skills a little bit at a time.  I think it was around April or May when I wanted to fry some potatoes.  I don't remember exactly where I got the idea to do it this way, but I cut it into cubes, added some chopped onion and green bell pepper and fried it all together on the stove top, like a stir fry.  Then I think I just ate it with ketchup or something.  Very simple and it tasted simple.  Good, but simple.  Over time I tried new things and experimented here and there.  During late summer and fall when my sisters garden produced an abundance of green zucchini and yellow squash, I was using large amounts of those as a base, along with the potato, then adding various things to it.
     Any of the following ingredients have been used at different times (but never all at once) and many are interchangeable depending upon availability and desired flavor:  Yukon gold potatoes, red potatoes, green zucchini, hybrid yellow summer squash, yellow crookneck squash, Green bell pepper, red bell pepper, jalapeno pepper, white onion, yellow onion, green tomato, fried chicken (shredded), chopped hot dogs, scrambled eggs, crushed almond, crushed walnut, salt, fresh ground pepper, onion powder, garlic seasoning, colby jack cheese, pepperjack cheese, ketchup, salsa and probably a bunch of stuff I have already forgotten.  But the purpose of this writing is to discuss the greatest of all, which was unlike any previous.
     Usually I use a small blop of vegetable oil on the pan but this time I switched to olive oil.  This is necessary to prevent the cubed potatoes from sticking to each other or the pan itself.  The potatoes always go in first since they will take longest to cook through.  Usually I do this uncovered on medium heat.  This time however, I kept it covered on low to medium-low heat.  I used one red potato and one gold potato.  While the potatoes were slowly cooking, I meticulously chopped up about 3/4 of a small white onion, moving the potatoes around periodically then adding the onions.  Then I cut up one whole green bell pepper and one half red bell pepper and added them in, stirring periodically to prevent burning and keeping covered on low heat.
     This is where it starts getting interesting...  In another pan, I began frying up several strips of low sodium bacon.  I think I did about 8-10 strips in total, making sure that they were well done so they are crispy when cooled.  In between frying bacon strips, I thinly sliced up some broccoli stem that needed using and I also threw in a few small broccoli tops.  I thawed two regular hot dogs in the microwave and sliced them twice longways, then from the end getting four small pieces on each cut.  About a dozen or more whole almonds were then crushed with a strong spoon.  All was added to the pan except the bacon which was cooling off.  Once cooled, I broke apart the bacon strips into very small pieces and stirred them in.  Near this point I took the lid off and kept it off to release some of the moisture.  Keeping it on low heat, the entire process was slow cooked from the beginning for about an hour and a half.  I seasoned it with a few shakes of salt, a few turns of the peppercorn grinder, a few shakes of bbq seasoning, with about 3 or 4 slices of lime squeezed in.  Stir a few more times then serve with generous amounts of shredded pepperjack cheese on top so that it gets halfway melty.  Devour.
     The biggest, not so secret, ingredient here that helps to make it so epic is the copious amount of bacon.  Additionally the bbq seasoning, lime and shredded pepperjack make a significant contribution as well.  The amounts I used, created about 3 adult size servings, at least that's how many times I filled my plate before I had transferred the entire contents of the pan into my stomach.  It was amazingly delicious in every way possible.  This, was a meal for one purpose.  To feed a hungry man!